I am inside myself
I am descending towards the depths of the dark pulses;
... how difficult it is to conceive from above the noise produced by the sea and fire
hitting the being;
I can't tell you where I'm crossing
ah, I do not want, in any way, a cult that consecrates and fills the misfortune of memory
... if this light did not accompany me,
- the fragile match that gives pain -
Could I even enter where I have been for so long
so much did I destroy and so much did I love?
... but the law in which he instituted me and which now destroys me,
Would you know the enormity of this noise, its depth,
the impiety and torment of living?
... within me voices stir, hallucinations and screams,
the world rolls crazy and before my eyes everything groans and shudders,
it swells and grows, cracks and breaks;
... even knowing myself in myself, I feel imprisoned and scared,
and no, I don't know exactly where or how I am,
because being and the world face and hit, they dissolve, they come and go,
and a dry wind, freezing and at the same time boiling, unscrupulous,
I feel that it is robbing me of strength and light from my soul;
… Oh my God, my God, I can't take it anymore and my match goes out;
Well, I don't hear or feel being, I'm empty and lost, and no, I can't find my grip,
I do not consist or exist anywhere, no, it is not an expression of life,
no, I don't feel the pain.
Antonio Justel Rodriguez
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